Changes Within Myself
by ARDavies
Summary: Bella is scrutinized by the students and residents of Forks. Her parents push her to become someone she is not. She's constantly harassed for being overweight by Edward and friends. Read how she overcomes the odds and becomes stronger against all odds.
1. Chapter 1

**DISCLAIMER]** All characters, settings, etc. are property of Stephanie Meyer. The plot is property of the author. Author is in no way associated with the owners, creators, or producers of any media franchise. No copyright infringement is intended.

_**~A/N~**_

_**Big Thanks to my Beta "Mizzdee_FF" and "KitsuShel" for pre-reading for me. I wrote this O/S for the Fandom4Tsunami foundation. I hope everyone enjoys it. I really put a lot of myself into this fic. I am considering making it into a multi-chapter. Here it goes- ENJOY!**_

**~CwM~**

"_Head down, don't look up, keep walking- head down, don't look up, keep walking"_

I say to myself over and over in my mind. My jacket is zipped up all the way and my hood is placed over my head to cover the anxiety written all over my face. The hallways are jammed packed and the students at this school can be ruthless if you so much as look at them in the wrong way. I try to stay invisible, no one wants to pay attention to me. _Why would I be important to anyone? _I'm a nobody. Even my own mother thinks I'm worthless. I don't fit into the stereotypical high school barbie girl- I'm not skinny, pretty, popular. I'm just plain ol' Bella Swan, the Police Chief's overweight daughter. And by overweight I mean I wear a size ten in jeans and a large in blouses. You would think that's an average size, but here in Forks it's an anomaly. I could count on one hand how many overweight people live within our city's population.

My dad is constantly telling me that I am never going to find a husband if I don't "make myself beautiful". You would think since he is my father, he would at least try and make me feel somewhat accepted. It always seems as if he is trying to shrug me off on someone else so that he doesn't have to deal with me anymore- him nor my mother. What can I say about my mom... absolutely nothing. She treats me like a slave. I go home everyday after school just to cook, clean, do the laundry and do my homework all the while I try in vain to stay out of her way. She was the Homecoming Queen back when she was in high school. I was supposed to be some kind of legacy to step into her shoes when I reached high school but that didn't happen seeing how I wasn't a size two and didn't wear makeup or my hair wasn't as blonde as hers. Renee has bleach blonde hair, almost white, with blue eyes and a natural tan. I, on the other hand, am like my father in some ways; brown eyes, brown hair, pale skin, and an awful case of clumsiness. I cry at night hoping and praying that one day I can be taken out of my misery. I'm lonely no friends, no other siblings. Just me and my own self-deprecating thoughts that swim in my mind day in and day out.

"Ow" I cry out in pain as I hit the floor hard catching my fall on my elbow. I was so focused on looking down and averting my eyes that I didn't notice that the person walking in front of me had stopped at their locker causing me to bump into them hard.

"Watch the fuck out," he hissed.

"I-I'm s-sorry, I wasn't paying attention," I stuttered. When I look up to see who I smashed into. I groan internally. Of course, it would be the pain in my ass, Edward Cullen. He loathes me and I have no idea why he hates me so much if I have never even talked to him. I let him cheat off me in Biology, hell he even takes my notes when he thinks I'm not looking causing me to write them all over again.

When I went down it caused all my books and papers to scatter all over the hallway floor. I get on my hands and knees to try and gather them, but it's useless. Everyone is purposely kicking them further away from me, causing them to rip and crumble.

"You just might not be so worthless after all when you're on your knees," Edward teases and everyone laughs. His whole hate Bella crew is surrounding him. Rosalie, her boyfriend Emmett, Alice and Jasper plus the group of girls that Edward keeps around just in case he feels the need to drag one of them into the janitor's closet.

I roll my eyes and shake my head, trying to steady myself so that I can stand up, but my balance is thrown off and I fall again when Rosalie purposely pushes Alice into me. Edward stands right in front of me his crotch is right in my eye-line. I tense and try to move out of the way but before I can, he bends down and whispers in my ear. "You know, if you want to suck my dick, Swan, you can just ask- think of it as one of your snacks."

I grit my teeth together because this has gone too far. "Fuck off," I scoff at him. I shrug away from his closeness and right myself up. At this point I don't even care about my books or homework. I'll go and ask for copies of the handouts from my teachers. Mr. Banner won't mind nor will Mrs. Cope, they seem to be the only two people in all of Forks to actually treat me like a human being. I tighten the hold on my backpack and turn around.

"Who the hell, do you think you are?" Rosalie grabs my arm and shoves me into the lockers. I might be bigger than her in weight but she's taller thank me with murderous eyes.

"Look, I don't want any trouble. I'm sorry for bumping into Edward. It won't happen again." My eyes are already starting to tear.

"Let this be a warning, Bella. I don't like you! You're a waste of space in this school. If you come near any of us again, I will end you." I can't respond to her because I'm holding in the sobs that are threatening to come out.

"Let her go, Rose." Alice tried to convince her to release me but her grip is tightening on my left arm. I know there will be a bruise on it by the end of the day.

"Look at her, she's already fucking crying." Edward laughs and I avert my eyes, casting them down.

"The next time you want to be on your knees for me, Bella, just ask. You don't have to pretend to trip and fall. I'll let you suck my dick as long as you don't try to eat it." They all laugh at my expense.

"What's going on out here?" Mr. Hunter comes out of his classroom.

"Nothing Sir, we were just helping Bella out. She tripped and fell." Edward answers as he bends down to lift my English book handing it back to me.

"Bella, are you alright?" Mr. Hunter asks and I can hear the concern in his voice. I look up and meet his gaze. In my peripheral vision I can see Rosalie burning holes into my head.

"Yes, thank you. I tripped and they were just helping me gather my things." I can hear the hoarseness in my voice from wanting to cry. He stares at me for a couple of seconds longer before nodding his head and shooing us to class. I let out a large breath, sighing in relief. Well that wasn't so bad, they've done worse things to me.

I walk into the library and head straight to the very back where I usually spend my off period, browsing the bookcases that hold the old, tattered classic books. This section of the library doesn't really have much lighting, other than the one fluorescent bulb right above the light yellow couch that is positioned against the large windows overlooking the Pacific Northwest. The view is so peaceful and relaxing it takes away all my miseries even if it's only for an hour and half. But everyday it gives me a little sense of peace that I long for. I grab my old copy of Wuthering Heights and open it, going straight to the page that folds at the very tips, bookmarking were I left off yesterday.

I try to stay focused on the words that are flowing across the old brown colored pages, but it's fruitless. My mind continues to wander and I turn my head towards the amazing view. I let my eyes close as I see my future. Far away from here; new people, friends, new experiences. I can leave this shitty town and never come back. Graduation is only three weeks away and then I am done. I got accepted into Dartmouth's English Program on a full scholarship. I worked my ass off all four years of high school to be able to get far away from here. I knew that my mom and dad wouldn't pay for my college since they are so convinced I'm going to fail. That I should just "make myself beautiful" so that I can get married and become some stay at home wife like my mother. I'm sorry but that is not me.

When I received my acceptance letter in the mail, I was so happy and ecstatic. I ran straight to my mom and shoved the paper at her so that she can hug me and congratulate me on my hard work. Hoping that she can be happy for me and show that cares for me, show me some sort of loving emotion, and just be my mother for the first time. When she read the paper, she raised an eyebrow and looked me dead in the eye before telling me that it was "pointless" of me to think that going to college would get me anywhere. She crushed my soul that day. That was the day that I no longer considered her "Mom" to me, now she's just "Renee". I decided that I would leave the day after graduation to get a head start settling in. I already had all my things packed and boxed up ready to be shipped out. I was leaving everything behind besides my books, and clothes. I didn't want anything that could remind me of Forks. This chapter of my life would officially come to a close when I step on the plane taking me away and to my new life in Hanover.

I was blissful in my thoughts when I started to hear the chatter of the people in the front of the library reach me, so I pulled my iPod out of my backpack and plugged the earphones into my ears. 'Adele' came flowing into my ears and drowned out the voices. Her music is so inspiring to me and a tear slides down my cheeks. I make no movement to stop it as it falls off my face and lands on my sweater. Looking down to the small wet stain that was left behind makes me realize that I am miserable and I let everyone around me dictate my own feelings. I need to be better for myself, I need to be stronger. I constantly beg and plead for a change, not only of my surroundings but also within myself. The thing that I never realize is that in order for me to change, I have to make an effort and push myself to become better. "I can do it," I whisper to no one but myself. I have a goal in mind that I want to reach and starting this summer, I am gonna reach it no matter what. It's gonna be hard and things are going to get worse before they can get better, but I'm stubborn and when I put my mind to something, I stick to it.

The bell rings and I shove my iPod and book back in my backpack before slinging it across my shoulder. This time when I walk in the hallway, I make sure to look up and straighten out my shoulders- no more hiding. I'm determined to be stronger.

"Whatever it takes," I mumble.

When I walk into Biology, Mr. Banner is setting up the microscopes on the blacktop tables that we use as desks. Everyone starts filtering in as the tardy bell nears and Edward sits down next to me. I do what I always do in this class; ignore him taking out my notebook and pen. Mr. Banner instructs us to write the notes that are written on the board before we begin our labs. My hair falls off my shoulders and surrounds my face as I bend slightly when I being to write. I can tell that Edward is not even attempting to write anything down and I just know that he is going to try and take mine. This time, however, I am not going to let him have a free ride on my behalf. I grab my notebook and take some previous notes that I wrote from two classes ago and put them in front of the ones that I am currently writing. To anyone else it looks as though I am writing on that sheet, but I know differently. When I'm done, I place both sheets together and look over at him slightly out of the corner of my eye and notice that he's playing with his phone under the table.

"Did you write all the notes?" he asks and I just nod my head. Not even turning my head to him.

"Let me copy them."

It doesn't come out as a question, but more as a demand. I pull my lip in between my teeth and consider backing out of my plan but before I can respond, he yanks them out from under my arm.

"I'll give them back to you tomorrow."

Of course, I know that they are not going to be given back to me but those notes don't matter anymore. The one that I have tucked into my folder now are the notes that I have just written down and the notes that we have to study in order to pass our final exams. It might be mean and cruel of me to be the reason he might fail the test but at this point I no longer care, he deserves it.

"Alright everyone, today we are going to test out blood to figure out blood types." Mr. Banner starts to explain how to use the needles, testing strips, and slides.

I panic because the smell of blood always causes me to get light headed. I have never been able to handle it without passing out.

"Mr. Banner," I call out as I raise my hand.

"Yes, Bella."

"Can I go to the nurse? I feel nauseated." I ask, yes I'm lying but I know that I won't be able to stand being in this class when everyone starts to prick their fingers.

"Sure." He writes me a pass as gather my belongings.

"What's the matter, Bella? Are you pregnant? No wonder your fat. I hear morning sickness is a bitch." Mike Newton laughs and bumps fits with his lab partner, Tyler.

"Of course she's not pregnant jackass," Edward answers for me.

My eyes widen in surprise. He was actually sticking up for me? "Nobody would want to fuck that!" He spat as he waves his hand up and down, making the whole class snicker and laugh out loud.

"Everyone settle down now! Here you go, Bella," Mr. Banner says and hands me the nurse's pass.

Thankfully this is my last class of the day and Nurse Randall lets me leave. My truck is parked at the very end of the lot and I have to watch my step when I walk since there are puddles of water everywhere, rain in Forks is inevitable. The school is only a ten minute drive from my house so it doesn't take long to make it home. Walking into the house, I hear the television on in the living room and Renee as she chatters on the phone to god knows who. She looks up in my direction when she hears me slam the door. I slam it hard on purpose.

"What are you doing home early?" she asks.

"I felt sick," I vaguely answer and start for the stairs.

"Make sure to have your father's dinner ready by 5:00."

"Ok."

My room is another place that I can find some sort of solace. I lock the door behind me and let my body fall onto my bed. I don't let myself linger too long and get up to start my homework.

I make Spaghetti and garlic bread for dinner. I have to serve them and be the waitress as they demand water, salt, second servings. Finally sitting down to start eating, Renee reminds me not to eat too much because I don't want to get "fatter". That alone made my whole appetite go away and I let my fork fall onto the plate as I stand to throw it in the garbage.

"There you go, Bella. You're finally listening to me." I look over to Renee and she actually looks happy that I didn't finish. She really thinks that I am listening to the disgusting words that are coming out of her mouth.

"I'm going to bed," I scoff and run to my room. When the door closes tears fall rapidly. I can't wait to leave this place. "You're strong," I say over and over to myself. Now I am even more determined to change and nothing can stop me.

Graduation day is finally here! My excitement is vibrating through my veins. The taste of freedom at the tip of my tongue. My hair is brushed behind my shoulders; the black and white dress I picked out at the local Goodwill is flowing down to my knees with light gray ballet flats on my feet. My wrist is adorned with a bright red bracelet matching the earrings that were given to me as a poor excuse of a belated birthday gift from Charlie and Renee. The only piece of value on me is the ring my Grandma Marie gave me before she past when I was eight years old. I held onto it, only wearing it on special occasions or moments when I need to feel close to someone that truly loved me for me. I decided to put on a light coat of concealer under my eyes to cover the dark circles that have appeared from lack of sleep. I run the black eyeliner pencil lightly across my bottom lashes along with a small amount of light pink gloss to give me some color. It might not make a difference to anyone else but to me, it makes me feel beautiful. From now on, my opinion is going to be the only one that matters. I look at myself in the full length mirror that is hanging on hooks against my closet door and deem myself satisfied. I grab the black cardigan off my bed along with my cap and gown and walk out of the room. The house is silent as Charlie is at work and Renee is still asleep. I made sure to be a good daughter to them and extended an invitation to attend the commencement ceremony that marks the end of my High School life, but being the loving parents that they're not, they denied me. I'll have no one in the stands to cheer me on, no one to hug as I walk down the stage after shaking hands with the Principal and receiving my Diploma. At that thought, a single tear escapes my eye and I rapidly brush it off. _I will not cry, I will not cry. _I'm better than that now. I am stronger!

After the horrible run in with Edward and Rosalie I managed to slide under the radar. The only incident that I endured was when Edward realized that I screwed him over. That caused me to get a large bump on the back of my head when I hit the tiled showers in the girl's locker room. Rosalie shoved me into them while the water was running scalding hot, even though I had all of my clothes on, it still managed to make my entire body turn pink from the heat. What's worse about it all was that Alice was videotaping it. Now the entire Forks High student body can replay the video over and over on YouTube as I cry and try in vain to cover myself up since the shirt I had on was white. I never mentioned that to anyone, not the teachers, not the guidance counselors, not even my nonexistent parents. I knew better than that. If I would report her, then my life would be a living hell. I sucked it up and kept on wasting space, as they call it. Biding my time till I leave Forks and never look back.

The Auditorium is packed with families and friends of my fellow classmates. Big smiles on their faces, waiting to see their sons or daughters cross the stage. The seniors are escorted to the sidelines as we are arranged by last name. Thankfully the "S's" are towards the end and I can avoid everyone that loathes me the most. The crowd roars in applause as we walk in a straight line to the rows and rows of seats that are set up in even lines of ten. Taking my seat, my eyes automatically lifted to the front of the stage were our Principal was getting ready to begin. Things went pretty quick after his speech and the next thing I knew, I was three people from taking the stage to grab the rolled up Diploma that was tied with a red satin ribbon.

"Isabella Swan."

Taking a deep breath, I climb up the two steps to the stage. I stop to shake hands with all the teachers and take a mandatory picture with our Principal. The crowd claps for me- of course it's out of kindness like they did for everyone else and I smile.

On my way back to my seat a foot comes out from the outer isle that sends me falling down on my hands and knees.

"No, Swan, you can't suck my dick right now. Get off your knees." Edward snickers and everyone including some nearby teachers laugh.

This has to be one of the most embarrassing moments in my life. It's one thing to humiliate me in front of his little brown nosed group of girls, but to do it on one of the most important milestones of our lives in front of the whole town is another. I can't hold back the tears that are falling fiercely out of my eyes. I get up and walk back to my seat as fast as my feet will take me, brushing the snot that is coming out of my nose with the back of my hand and I hide behind the curtain of hair that is hiding my face. Eventually the attention gets turned back to the kids walking across the stage. An hour later the class of 2010 is announced and hats go flying in the air. I chose to hang on to mine- the cliché is not for me. The crowd rushes down the bleachers looking for their sons or daughters while I make my way to the "EXIT" sign that is hanging above the door. I push against the steel handle, but not before taking one last look at the hellhole that I have endured for four years. I smile knowing what was my reality has turned into my past and I can move on and let go.

**~CwM~**

I have my bags packed, my boxes have already been dropped off at the UPS store in Port Angeles. They should be sent out tomorrow so that I can have time to arrive at the dorms and sign for them. The walls to my room are completely bare, the only hint of my presence is the bedspread that is still covering the old twin bed. Too many tears have landed on that blanket, I feel like it's been tainted by the life I am leaving behind. I throw the backpack across my shoulder and walk out the room, closing the old squeaking door behind me. Charlie is driving me to the airport, not by choice but paying for a taxi will cost more than the amount of gas he is wasting.

"You'll be back. I give you half the year before you flunk out." Renee dismissed me with a flick of her wrist.

"Bye Renee," I mumble as I make my way to the car.

The whole ride to the airport was met with uncomfortable silence. Charlie kept squirming in his seat opening his mouth and closing it as if he had something to say. As we arrived, he just drove straight to the passenger drop off and sat in his seat looking straight ahead. I was tempted to lean over and give him a one armed hug but thought against it.

"Take care kid." Those were the last words Charlie left me with as he drove away from the curb.

The flight was pretty short and quiet, the guy sitting next to me kept to himself as he dosed off to sleep. As we descended into Hanover, I was starting to feel the butterflies in my stomach full of excitement. I couldn't keep the smile off my face.

I took a cab straight to the University and headed for the Registrar's office. I made sure to book an early departure so that I could arrive within business hours, the secretary gave me my room number and key and sent me on my way. When I looked down to the paperwork, I noticed that I was placed in a single room without a roommate. Thinking it was a mistake, I made a U-turn and went back to verify it was correct. To my luck, the Scholarship I received covered a private dorm with an attached en-suite. The room was pretty basic, it had a full sized bed in the middle of the room with a side table and lamp. My closet was to the right and the bathroom was right across from the bed on the left side. There was a large window that was decorated with a soft basic blue curtain and white mini-blinds. "This is fucking perfect!" I screamed out in happiness. It didn't take me long to unpack. My dressers were now filled with clothes and the closet no longer looked bare.

It took me two whole days to finally buy a new bedspread, small refrigerator plus a convection oven. Grandma Marie left me with a very small inheritance that I never touched, but it was enough to get basic items plus look around town for a small used car. I didn't need anything fancy, just something to get me from point A to point B.

I found a 2005 Honda Civic in my price range and immediately contacted the seller. Three days later, I had my first car. Life was good so far. I felt free, all the tension in my shoulders was gone. When I walk down the streets or into a store, no one looks at me funny, starts to whisper, or stares. It feels normal. Everyone just goes on minding their own business.

The summer was coming to a close and students began to fill the empty dorms. I've been keeping myself busy by going to the gym, exploring the town, visiting landmarks. I still have not received any calls, letters, emails from Charlie and Renee, but that was expected. I've been eating healthy, going for jogs every morning through the courtyard. My hair was shorter now, since I got it cut in layers, the wax treatment I endured made my eyebrows have more shape and definition. I felt beautiful. I was 25 pounds lighter than I was when I arrived; it feels phenomenal. To know that I did it on my own for my own reasons, not to have a husband and please everyone but it made me feel better to know that I was taking care of myself properly. I was down to a size six and medium shirts. I even had to go out and buy new clothes, only this time I shielded away from the usual large t-shirts and baggy jeans and went for a more grown-up sophisticated look. The skinny jeans the sales rep picked out for me looks amazing with the fitted tops. They accented my curves and showed off my new body. I have even gotten asked out a couple of times but declined the invitations. I still am not ready to add pressure to myself with school beginning soon and my class load was pretty heavy.

If I am honest with myself, I have to admit that I am still insecure about dating. Every time someone tries to approach me I tense, my mind reverts back to Edward and his posse's attacks on me. I have to remind myself over and over that they can no longer hurt me. I am halfway across the world from them. It's in the past.

Walking into class for the very first time is nerve wracking. I am literally biting the end of my thumb that has become raw, it's an ugly habit that I've had since I was a kid. The class is already filled with bodies scattered in the desk all over the room. I notice two desks at the very top corner empty and make my way up. It's out of the limelight and in the far corner, but yet I can see the whole class. I let out a breath I didn't realize I was holding taking my seat.

"Good Morning, everyone. I am Professor Stein and Welcome to English 1A."

Everyone's attention is focused on the Professor when the door whips open and a tall, lean guy walks in with his hood on his head and glasses perched on the bridge of his nose.

"Nice of you to join us Mr...?" Professor asks, his voice is laced with sarcasm. The guy mumbles his name but I couldn't hear it properly since I am at the very top.

"Take off your glasses, the sun isn't shining in here. I want your eyes on the board and your ears focused on the lecture. Take your seat"

He takes off his glasses but his back is to me and I can't see his face, but when he pulls down the hood his bronze hair is showcased to everyone. It seems oddly familiar but I don't let my mind wander to him. It's impossible.

"Take a seat."

When he turns around to the class, my heart beat spikes, my palms start to get sweaty and shaky. His eyes still haven't met mine since he's scanning the room for an available seat, but there is none, only the seat to my left. I cast my eyes down and lower my head a bit. I can no longer see him but I can hear his footsteps as they make their way to me. His cologne immediately hits my nose as he throws himself down to the seat. He takes out a binder from his sack.

"Shit." I hear him hiss under his breath. "Do you have a pen I can borrow?" he asks me in a whisper. If I lean down to my bag that is on the ground between us, he will most definitely see me. I shouldn't hide from him. This is my chance to prove that he can no longer hurt me. So I take a deep breath and raise my head, placing my hair behind my ear.

I look him directly in the eye "No." Recognition dawns on him immediately and he stares at me with wide eyes. Eventually they start roaming down my body and his tongue darts out of his mouth and licks his lips.

"Bella?"

"That's Isabella, to you."

"What happened to you? I mean you look...?" He didn't finish his sentence since Professor Stein called our attention. The rest of the class was awkward and uncomfortable, I was itching to leave.

I contemplated leaving early but then thought against it. I'm here on a scholarship and I can't afford to miss any parts of class. Edward Cullen was not going to scare me away. When we were finally dismissed, I shot out of my chair so fast, I'm thankful I didn't trip down the stairs. I was halfway down the courtyard when Edward caught up with me.

"Bel.. I mean Isabella, how are you here? I mean I didn't know you applied here?"

I rolled my eyes. "Contrary to your belief Edward, I had an almost perfect grade point average. It wasn't that hard to get accepted. Why wouldn't I be here?"

"It's just I never thought you would end up at a school like this."

"A school like this?" I asked as I kept walking, faster with each step.

"I mean, it's pretty expensive."

I scoffed at his conceited words.

"I didn't mean it like that, it's just your dad was just Chief of Police. This place probably cost more than he makes in a year."

"Yeah, well daddy dearest didn't pay for anything. I don't have to explain myself to you. Leave me alone," I spat.

"Hey, calm down. I'm trying to be nice. We don't know anyone here. Maybe we can hang out and keep each other company."

"Are you fucking serious right now? You made my life a living hell when we were in Forks. I moved away. The farthest I could to get away from you and everyone else at that school that constantly made me cry my eyes out at night. And now you want to be friends like nothing ever happened? Get real, Edward. Go find someone else to harass and stay away from me!"

He put his hands up in surrender "Whoa, I don't want to upset you. I just thought maybe we could start over, let bygones be bygones. You look really good by the way."

"Fuck you! Now you want to treat me like a human being after I lost weight, cut my hair, basically leaving the old Bella behind just to get rid of the horrible memories that plagued me day in and day out. I don't need or want anything from you. Listen to me very carefully. This is no longer Forks High, I'm not the same girl I was three months ago. I'm not gonna sit around and let you trip me while I'm walking or make innuendos about me sucking your dick. If you think for one second you can be the prick you were to me back then, then you have another thing coming. Nothing is going to take this away from me. So run along and leave me the fuck alone!"

I was breathing heavy as my anger was spiking. He was in just staring at me in shock with wide eyes.

"I-I'm sorry."

"Yeah you said that before. Yet it still means nothing to me. You can shove it up your ass. No apologies will ever be sufficient enough for the torture you enlisted upon me."

"At least give me a chance to show you how sorry I am. I was a fucking idiot in high school, I know that now. I had a lot of time to think about my actions not only to you, but to everyone that I fucked over."

"You're not worth my time." With that I shoved past him and ran upstairs to my dorm. I shut the door behind me and I felt BRAVE! It was amazing releasing all that pent up anger that I have held onto for so long. I no longer strived to be stronger. I AM STRONGER!

**~A/N~**

_**Thanks for reading everyone. This story hit close to home for me, and I want to just remind everyone that you are smart, beautiful, and you are worth it. Please do not to ever let anyone tell you differently. I am undecided if I want to continue this story or not. I have so many ideas that are running around in my head. Help me out peeps! What do y'all think should I continue it into a multi-chapter fic? Leave your opinion in the comments please. **_

_**Thanks, **_

_**Angie.**_

_**PLEASE REVIEW!**_


	2. Chapter 2

{Disclaimer} All Characters belongs to Stephanie Meyer and authorized media. Storyline and plot belong to me.

_**I'M BACK! Finally chapter two of "Changes within Myself" I decided to go ahead and make it a multi-chapter story. It is going to be a bumpy ride and you might shed some tears but I hope that you all will like it. BIG THANKS to my wonderful beta **__**Mizzdee_FF **__**without her, this story would be a grammatical mess.**_

_**Chapter song- ADELE 'Tired'**_

Time passed and I began to become more open with people. I went out, made awesome friends. I laughed, smiled more. Nothing was holding me back. I never spoke to Edward again after the day. He would try to engage me in conversations and I always answered with one-word responses. I had to admit he tried to make things right, but there was just too much wrong to be righted.

Charlie and Renee were nonexistent to me. They never called and I never called them. I was parent-less now, alone in the world. Some people would be sad to be alone, but for the first time in my life, being alone was a blessing. I no longer had them hovering over me to become someone that I am not.

The holidays were fast approaching and the hallways began to be littered with suitcases and duffle bags as the majorly of the student body planned to go home and visit loved ones. I had a few offers from friends to make the trip to their home with them to join in on the festivities but I politely declined. It made me feel like a burden to them and their families. I'd had enough burdens to last a lifetime. I went out and bought a turkey that was sufficiently small enough to make in my convectional oven that was conveniently plugged into my dorm room wall. I also had a family sized bag of Doritos sitting on my bedside table waiting to be eaten along with it. My Thanksgiving meal might not be the most conventional to most people, but to me, it was perfection. I had my plans set in stone, and I couldn't wait for the hallways to be empty and the noise to be almost nonexistent.

Traffic out of the parking lot was going to be hellish, but I decided to brave it and head out to the local grocery market for some sodas and dessert. I threw on a pair of sweat pants, grabbed my purse and headed out the door. Making my way out of the building, I had my head down as I was digging through my purse for my car keys, I didn't even notice that someone was making their way in at the same time and we collided, knocking me to the ground just as I retrieved my keys from the small side pocket of my purse.

"Just like old times, huh?" I heard him say with an amused tone.

I didn't even have to lift my eyes to connect with his pale face to know who the voice belonged to.

"Whatever." I pushed myself off the ground. "Sorry," I mumbled as I tried to walk around Edward when my feet were grounded on the cement floor.

"Hey, hey!" He grabbed a hold of my upper arm as I tried to walk around him. My mind instantly reverted back to my bullied high school days and my blood began to boil in anger. "Let go of me." I yanked my arm out of his grasp. "Don't ever touch me, you have no right to touch me. "

"Bella, I'm sorry. I didn't mean to touch you."

"For the millionth time- my name is Isabella." I pointed to my chest. "Now, what do you want?"

"I came to see if you were going to go home for the break?"

I must have had the look on my face that said "What the hell are you thinking" because he immediately started to explain the reason for his question.

"It's just that I'm leaving in about two hours and I wanted to know if you wanted to drive down together?"

I couldn't hold my laughter as soon as the words came out of his mouth. Tears started to spring out of my eyes as I laughed harder than I had in months. He had the audacity to ask me a question of that capacity.

"Are you seriously asking me that question? Really?" I asked him in return when I finally caught my breath and regained some composure.

"Yeah, I mean we are going to the same place and I figured we can save some cash if we both take the trip together. You can save the money from your airline ticket and I can save some money if we split the gas money. I mean you don't have to pay me if you can't afford it." I was just about to attack him on his assumption that I wouldn't be able to afford it when he quickly began to berate himself. "That's not what I meant, I meant.. fuck I'm sorry this isn't coming out right. I just wanted to be able to talk to you without you always trying to run away from me or ignoring me every time I approach you." He ran a hand through his hair. "What I was trying to say is that you don't have to spot any gas money if you don't want to. I can pay for it; it really isn't a big deal to me. I'm talking about the money not being a big deal to me, you riding with me is a big deal to me." He ran his hands up and down his face trying to hide his embarrassment. If I actually cared about how uncomfortable he was right now I would have stopped his rant as soon as his question was asked, but seeing him flustered was amusing.

"No," was the only answer I gave him and turned to walk towards the parking lot.

"What do you mean no?"

"No- as in N O... No."

"Why not?" he asked as his steps began to match mine.

"Because, I said so."

"That's not an answer and you know it."

I stopped and turned to face him directly to answer him. Hopefully he'd get out of my face and I could go and buy the soda that I had been thinking about for last three hours. "No, Edward, because I am not going home for the break, I'm not going home for Christmas, I'm not going home for New Years, Spring Break, Easter, or Summer. I'm not going home ever! I left Forks behind the moment I graduated and I have no plans of going back to the hell that was my life for the last nineteen years. The worst being the last four years I was in high school no thanks to you and your groupies that followed you around like lost puppies. So again, the answer is NO! It will always be NO!"

I didn't bother to wait for a response as I walked the remaining five steps that took me to my car and hit the unlock button on the key remote. As I opened the car door and prepared to step in, I looked up and locked eyes with Edward. His eyes were red and his nose was beginning to redden as I saw a small tear leak from his eye as the guilt and remorse filled his expression. I ignored him and turned the car on. As I drove away, I looked into my rearview mirror noticing that Edward was still standing in the same spot where I left him.

I stopped at the stop sign and took a deep breath, closing my eyes as I pushed the sorrow away. He deserved my words and harshness. I made myself reason. For a small second I felt guilty. What gave me the right to treat him the same way he treated me? I didn't give myself long to simmer in my own doubt as the car behind me honked and I let those thoughts leave my mind completely.

He did deserve it.

Right?

**~CwM~**

The trip to the market took longer than expected. The lines to check out were almost at the back of the store. It reminded me of Wal-Mart. Every time you step into a Wal-Mart store they only have two cashiers open and, on top of that, they are moving so slow that you are almost tempted to sit on the floor just to pass the time.

I kept thinking about my altercation with Edward earlier about going home for Thanksgiving, it got me thinking about Charlie and Renee. I bet they're expecting me to walk through the front door any minute now and slave away in the kitchen, making them a meal that they would probably be ungrateful for and I was sure I would be ridiculed over it. The vindictive bitch inside me smiled and did a happy dance, thinking of their faces when they realized that I was not going back and they're left to fend for themselves. I could hear them talking about me already to all of their snotty friends about how I am such a horrible daughter. It felt good and liberating to be on the other side as the tables turned. I was now on the other side abandoning them, ignoring them, treating them as if they never existed. Life was about choices and I made mine the moment I stepped onto the plane. Now it's time to leave the past behind me and start living the choice I made, to leave and never look back.

I grabbed a spoon out of my desk drawer to eat the pint of cookies-n-cream ice-cream I bought and snuggled into my blankets to watch the new vampire movie that everyone had been raving about. I'd been reluctant to see it since I wasn't really into Sci-Fi movies, but I thought I might give this one a try. The main character looked so handsome that I couldn't pass up the opportunity to gawk at him throughout the whole movie.

I was half way through the movie when a knock at my door rang out. Confused at who would be knocking this late at night, I reluctantly got off the bed and tip toed to the door to try and strain my ears to hear sounds coming from the other side. When I didn't answer the door after the first set of knocks, a second set rang out louder, echoing off the hallway walls.

Looking around the room for something to protect myself with, all I found was a two-inch kitten heel boot. I picked it up and cautiously unlocked the door, opening it wide enough for half of my face to show.

"Oh hell no!" I went to close my door in his face when I saw who was interrupting my movie night with the very British Robert Pattinson. I tried to have fast reflexes and shut it quick but he was faster and blocked the door from closing all the way. "Shouldn't you be gone to Forks by now?" I asked.

He shook his head. "I figured it wasn't worth it to drive back and forth just for a couple of days." His hands were deep in his jean pockets and his shoulders were hunched. He looked resigned.

"Why are you here?" I waved to my door. "At my door this late at night? And who let you in here? Is the security guard not at his check in desk?" I asked as I got nervous, thinking anyone can just walk in and, with almost all of the students gone, it made me paranoid.

"He's there, I just slipped him a twenty and he let me through." He shrugged.

We both stood and looked at each other awkwardly until I had enough. "Well thanks for the unwelcomed visit. Bye." I went to shut the door again.

His hand shot out and stopped it from closing again. "I'm sorry," he blurted out.

"Sorry?"

"I'm sorry for all the fucked up shit I did to you. I'm sorry for making you cry and harassing you." His hand pulled at his hair. "I know that I fucked up with you and probably half of Forks high, but I really, really want to try and make it up to you. I know that I don't deserve it but I want to at least try; please," he pleaded.

"Why?" I asked. "Why now? After everything you did to me"? I shook my head. "I'm sorry too, Edward, but it's too late. We keep having this conversation over and over again but I don't know how many times I am going to tell you that I can never forgive you for the hurt you all caused me. You want my forgiveness now after everyone is gone and you are no longer the king of the school, now that you have no one following you and worshipping the ground you walk on. You're a commoner like me now. No one cares what brand of shirt you wear, who you fuck in the janitors closest, or if you're the high school quarterback. Now that you have no one, you want me to accept your apologies?" My anger was starting to rise again and I knew I had to end this little talk before I snapped.

"I was an idiot back then; I thought that it was all just a joke. I didn't know that we were affecting you so much. I didn't even stop to consider your feelings. I thought that you just understood that we would just kid around and make jokes to have a laugh."

"Kid around?" I laughed. "You think lighting my locker on fire, or giving me bruises from the amount of pressure your hand would have on arm every time you would drag and lock me in the storage closet what just kidding around?"

"Bruises?" He looked horrified. "I never knew that I would leave you bruises."

"Yes bruises, why do you think I always wore long sleeved shirts?" I didn't give him a chance to answer before I responded to my own question. "To cover up the evidence from your cruel pranks that I have to come to learn was just you 'kidding' around." I lifted my hand to make air quotes.

"I'm begging you, Bella, please- please let me try to make things right with you. Even if you don't forgive me, at least give me a chance to show you that I've changed. I'm not that same guy anymore. I grew up. Well, at least I think I grew up. I don't drink or smoke anymore and I don't hang with or talk to anyone from back home. In fact, I haven't spoken to any of them since summer. I'm not asking you to just let things go over night but give me some time to try and change your mind about me. I like you, I really like you. You're smart and fucking strong- you are so strong to have endured all the shit we put you through and still be able to hold your head up high and get into an Ivy League school with an all expense paid scholarship." He stepped towards me and I braced myself to step back but he took hold of my shoulders. "I promise you that I will never again be that person with you. I will never hurt you again," he said with sincerity in his tone.

I took a deep breath and stepped back. "It's not about you hurting me, the damage is done. My heart has been turned into stone. I have nothing left for you to hurt." A tear ran down my cheek, thinking about no one loving me. I love being on my own away from the bad in Forks but it still hurts to know that I have no one to love me. "The fact of the matter is that you are right, I am strong. You, Rosalie, Alice, Jasper and Emmett don't have to worry. I won't be spiteful to you and I won't try to get my revenge. I'm better than that." I wiped my cheeks. "We can be civil. I won't be your best friend and I won't go out of my way to greet you or talk to you. But I won't be a bitch either."

He smiled. "My promise to you still stands; I won't be that person to you anymore. Thank you for giving me a chance to become your friend."

"I never said we can be friends. I said I will be civil, there's a difference."

"Right, that's what I meant." He winked. "I better get going before you change your mind." He pulled the hood to his jacket over his head and turned.

"Wait!" I shouted out to him when it occurred to me that he never answered my question from earlier.

He turned around and raised his eyebrows to me. "Why are you not in Forks?" I asked.

"I figured it wasn't worth the drive if you weren't with me." His shoulders shrugged. "Have a good Thanksgiving," he said and started to walk down the stairs.

I closed the door and stood speechless as I leaned my back against the door, confused by Edward's actions and his persistence for me to forgive him. Could this be another one of his ruses to get me to trust him and then he'd turn around and humiliate me all over again? Could I trust this new and improved Edward?

The only thing that I was sure of was that only time could tell me the answers to my own questions.

**I know this chapter was sort of short, but I promise they will be longer with time. I was just trying to get something out before the end of the year.**

**HAPPY HOLIDAYS TO EVERYONE AND HAPPY NEW YEAR!**

**Leave me your comments and reviews please!**

**PLEASE REVIEW!**

**(IT CAN BE MY CHRISTMAS GIFT )**


	3. Chapter 3

**Stephenie Meyer owns all things Twilight. No copyright infringement is intended.**

**Changes Within Myself is finally back!**

**I am so sorry for taking so long to update. I really am grateful everyone stuck by and waited for the story to update. I don't have a regular update schedule or anything planned out but I am working on it. **

**Thank you so much to my beta **_**"Mizzdee_FF" without you this story would be a complete mess. **_

**Here it goes… **

**Changes Within Myself- Chapter 3- Dinner**

**T**he rain pounded on the ground as I pulled my hoodie over my head. I needed to clear my mind, having Edward around had made me edgy and anxious. I could feel my anxiety spiking, the way my heart accelerated at the thought of him being cruel and violent towards me. I put my earbuds in and took off, my feet striding forward and taking me to a place that made everything disappear.

There were no students around, the campus was quiet and calm. Everyone was home with their happy families, eating a big feast while laughing and enjoying each other's company most likely. My eyes wanted to water but I pushed it away and my heartbeat accelerated again at the unsettling thought of never having that family.

I had always wondered what was so wrong with me that made my own parents hate me so much. I did everything for them, I gave my little heart to them when I was younger, loving them and always wishing they would love me back. Shaking my head, I threw those thoughts away. I would not dwell on the past.

I continued on my run until I was panting for air. Slowing down, I raised my arms up and rested them on my head, helping the air get to my lungs. I looked around and noticed that I was on the complete opposite side of the campus. It was a little unnerving, almost like a bad horror movie and you expected Mike Myers to pop out at any moment. Chuckling to myself, I changed the song on my iPhone and began my run back to my dorm.

The upbeat tunes of VV Brown's "Shark in the Water" got my adrenaline pumping again and I bobbed my head to the music as I began to sing along with the song. I started off singing quietly to myself but as my speed increased, my voice began to get louder. I had nothing to worry about, no one was around to hear me, it was liberating. I began to sing at the top of my lungs, smiling all the way home. "Home." It might be temporary and small since it was just a dorm but that was what it was to me, a "home" that I was comfortable and proud of.

"Shit," I said out loud as I turned the corner and saw Edward walking into the dorms.

I had a feeling he was coming to look for me and I debate hiding out and waiting for him to come back out. If I knew he was going to be bothering me this whole break, I would have lied and told him I was going out of town with some friends or something.

The wind was beginning to pick up and the rain was getting colder. My teeth began to chatter, I was shaking. Maybe I could sneak back into the building and hide out in the stairwell. I slowly walked up to the building and carefully opened the door, looking around to see if the coast was clear. I turned the music down and put my phone on vibrate. I felt like 007, pressing up to the walls and tip toeing through the halls.

"What are you doing?" Edward's voice rang out.

"AHHH," I hit him in the arm on instinct, "what the hell is wrong with you always creeping up on me like that?"

"You're the one trying to creep up on me. I saw you right when you walked in. Did you forget about the mirrors hanging at the corners?" He pointed to the security mirrors mounted on every corner of the wall.

"You know, if you keep hitting me every time I see you I might have to start wearing more layers of clothes." He rubbed his arm.

"Haha." I pushed him to the side to make my way up the stairs. "Like I said you should stop creeping up on me and I won't have to hit you. Sorry by the way, it was a reflex."

"You never hit me back before." Edward's words hung in the air as he realized what he just said.

"Yeah well that was then and I was a timid fat girl that was too scared to fight back against you and your harem of whores."

"Bella, I..."

"Don't say you're sorry." I cut him off. "It was the truth. I never fought back; I never stood up for myself and if I did things just got worse for me, right?" Why was I getting into this again with him? "Just... nevermind. I need to go change, I'm cold and wet."

"Are you hungry?" he blurted out.

"No." I turned and started up the stairs, of course he followed.

"Can I please take you out for dinner?"

"No."

"Please."

"No."

"Please."

"No."

"Pretty please."

"No." I reached my door and yanked the key out of my pocket.

"Why not?"

"Because, Edward, I don't want to. We aren't friends, hell we aren't even acquaintances, we just know each other. There is no reason to pretend any different."

Finally I got my door open and stepped in, turning around to end this conversation. I was tired, my body was starting to feel the run and I desperately wanted a shower and to curl in my bed watching movies or reading a good book. I actually was quite hungry but I wasn't going to tell him that.

"I thought we were going to try to be friends?" Edward asked as he attempted to step inside.

I put my hand on his chest. "No, I said we can be cordial, not friendly." Damn, I could feel his hard chest against my hand and I almost blushed.

"Please," he practically begged. "No funny business, no bullshit just two people getting something to eat, we don't even have to talk if you don't want to."

I knew I wasn't going to get rid of him unless I agreed. "Ugh fine." His face lit up. "BUT we aren't talking, and I will meet you there."

He shook his head no. "Let me pick you up, I'll drive."

"No, why?"

"Because I can almost guarantee you won't show up." Damn, he got me there. I really was going to stand him up; I just wanted to get rid of him.

I rolled my eyes and took a deep breath. "Fine, pick me up in an hour. I want to get out of these wet clothes."

"Can I wait in here?" He pointed to my room.

I shook my head vehemently. "Hell no, that's out of the question, not even an option."

He laughed and ran his hand through his hair. It was sticking up everywhere. "Come on, it won't make sense for me to go all the way home to turn right back as soon as I get there."

"You can wait in the common room downstairs." I pointed down.

"I'll be bored."

"You'll be bored in here too."

"I can watch TV."

"You can watch TV downstairs too."

"It's not the same."

"Yes it is. We have the same channels and plus the TV is bigger than mine," I said, widening my arms to emphasize the difference.

"It's not the same." I took a deep breath and shut my eyes, he took the opportunity to push past me and sit on my bed. "You got a nice room, it's pretty big."

I shut the door. "Don't touch anything, no digging through my things." I grabbed for the remote and turned the TV on. Some reality show was playing and I threw him the remote. "Don't move out of that spot. I'll know if you did, and I really won't be your friend."

He smiled. "See I knew you would give in and be my friend." He reclined back onto the headboard, yanking my pillow and putting it behind his head to prop him up.

"Whatever," I mumbled, making my way around the room grabbing my clothes.

"I mean it, Edward, don't go through any of my shit!"

"I won't. I am perfectly happy looking at Kim Kardashian." He pointed to the television and I rolled my eyes. What guy wouldn't be happy looking at Kim K's ass?

I walked into the en suite and turned the shower on. I really didn't plan on leaving my room for the rest of the day and now I had to get dressed and endure dinner with public enemy number one.

The car ride to the restaurant was tense, it felt as if we were never going to arrive. I could smell his cologne drifting in the car. We decided to go to the pizza shop close to campus since they had the best wings and pasta. I contemplated ordering a salad so he wouldn't have reason to make fun of me, but fuck it- I couldn't care less what he thought. I was going to eat my heart out. I could taste the chicken alfredo already. I smiled to myself knowing he was probably expecting me to be some dainty eater now that I lost all the weight. Ha, trick was on him because if he wanted to pay I was going to eat his money's worth.

"Soooo…" Edward tried to spark up a conversation.

I shook my head. "Shut up."

"What do you mean shut up?" He laughed "You won't even let me talk. The ride over here was fucking intense I think I sweated through my shirt." He lifted his arm to pretend to smell his pits.

I laughed but scolded him for it. "Don't be gross." I reached over the table to swat his hand down. I looked around to make sure no one is watching him potentially smell his underarms. "We are about to eat, please don't make me lose my appetite."

He let out a small laugh and shrugged. "At least I got you talking."

I nodded because it was true, he did get me to talk and laugh. I was sort of getting tired of playing the heartless bitch. I secretly wanted to spark up a conversation. I hadn't spoken to another person besides him in no telling how long. But my guard wouldn't budge and I couldn't do it.

I grabbed the straw and started to play with the wrapper. Slowly, I pulled the wrapper down the straw to make sure it stayed tight. When the wrapper was all bunched together, I slid it off and placed it on the table. I looked up to see Edward watching me curiously with his eyebrows scrunched together.

"What are you doing?"

I shook my head. "Just watch."

I grabbed my straw and placed it in my drink. I place my finger on the top opening of the straw to hold the soda inside. Slowly, I brought it down to the wrapper that I left all scrunched together on the table and, little by little, I let the soda fall onto it. I watched in amazement as the wrapper began to expand like a caterpillar braking out of his cocoon.

I smiled. "See."

He nodded. "That's pretty cool, in a middle school type of way."

"That was actually one of the only things my father taught me when I was younger, I think I was around seven years old. The good ole times when I wasn't fat and he wasn't ashamed to take me down to the diner and buy me a slice of apple pie." I shrugged and took a sip of my soda.

It still stung when I thought of my parents, a small part of me still longed to have that love and devotion a parent should have for their children.

"Yeah, they always had the best pie." He laughed and nodded his head agreeing with me. "Especially their pecan pie."

I stuck my finger in my mouth and pretended to vomit. "Yuck pecan pie is gross."

"Hell no, you don't know what you're missing."

He lifted his hand and waved, calling over the waitress. I turned toward her and saw her smile and swing her long ponytail side to side the way she was trying to sway her hips. Maybe I should tell her she was making herself look desperate and ridiculous. I paused and debated, but then I saw her roll her eyes my way and I decided she could make an ass of herself, because I honestly couldn't care less about her or what Edward thought of her.

"Did you need help with something," she asked and smirked, with her pencil hovering over her small notepad.

"Do you serve pecan pie," Edward asked and smiled back.

She licked her lips and let her tongue roll over her bottom lip longer than normal.

"No, sorry but we do have fresh, warm apple pie."

Her eyes looked like they were glossed over and all I could think of was the scene in American Pie when Jim had a little too much fun with his mom's homemade warm apple pie and I laughed out loud. I mean, full out laughing with tears and all.

When I was done, I wiped the tears away and noticed everyone was looking at me like I was insane. "Sorry, I needed that." I wiped once again under my eyes and cleared my throat.

I reached out and put my hand on the waitresses arm. "Mandy, it's ok we don't need any pie. I'll have the chicken alfredo pasta with garlic bread and a slice of pepperoni pizza." I handed her my discarded menu. "Edward, what are you going to order?"

He handed her the menu also and instructed her make that two orders of chicken alfredo.

"So what was so funny just now?" He raised his eyebrows and - damn did this boy look gorgeous with his eyebrows raised - you could see the perfect shape of them.

What the hell was I thinking? He was not gorgeous! I needed to get a cat scan. What the hell was wrong with me having these thought? I shook my head and looked away.

"Nothing."

I tried not to turn my head to him again and kept my eyes locked on the boy playing pacman in the corner. Wow, I hadn't seen a pacman machine in ages and my hands itched to go over and harass the kid to let me play one game for him.

"Come on, seriously? You laughed like no there was no tomorrow. Are you not going to let me in on the joke?" I heard him ask from the other end of the table.

I turned back briefly and shrugged my shoulders. "It really was nothing, something she said reminded me of a movie I once saw."

He didn't ask any more questions and seemed to be enthralled playing some game called Candy Crush on his cell phone, for which I was grateful.

"FUCK!"

I jumped and stared at him wide eyed. "What the hell is wrong with you?" I asked with my hand over my chest. He scared the living shit out of me.

He shoved his phone to me to show me his screen. "I didn't get all the fruit down and now I have to wait six minutes to get another life."

He tried to explain it to me but I had absolutely no idea what the hell he was talking about. So I ignored him and turned back to the kid who was currently kicking the old school pacman machine. That thing was a classic and he was ruining it with his dirty, muddy shoes. Without thinking about it, I got up and walked towards the machine.

"Hey! What did this game ever do to you?" I asked as I put my arm out to discreetly move him out the way. "It's my turn you lost."

I dug into my hoodie and, thankfully, I had some change and pulled out two quarters. I didn't feel Edward behind me until he was practically breathing down my neck.

"What the hell is wrong with you? Have you ever heard of personal space?" I pushed back slightly but my attention was currently on the little pacman eating up all the dots.

"I call next."

He leaned against the machine with one arm extended over the top and all I could see was his bicep. When I looked back down, the boogey man had eaten my pacman and took my last life away. He tried to enter his quarter into the slot but I pushed him away.

"You made me lose, it's still my turn." I dug into my pockets but I had no more change. Suddenly I remembered something and extended my hand out. "Give me your quarters." I demanded.

He laughed and shook his head side to side. "No, it's my turn. These are my quarters get your own." He shoved his hands into his pockets and I contemplated digging into them and taking the damn change back myself, but I didn't want to risk feeling any male body parts so I refrained with a huff.

"I thought we were friends," I asked. "Friends help each other out." I reached out again. "Do you have fifty cents I can have?"

Rolling his eyes, he dug out the money and handed it to me. "Only because you look so cute, fighting with a video game."

I didn't know how long we stood there and played. Yes I meant we. Edward tried guiding me through the maze but he only managed to confuse me and caused me to die. He changed in two dollars for quarters and we still hadn't passed level three.

"Excuse me" the waitress called to get our attention. "Your order is ready." She directed her statement to Edward.

We both thanked her and reluctantly headed back to the table.

The food smelled and looked delicious. We dug in and made idle small talk regarding our classes, majors, books, music, movies. When I couldn't take another bite without exploding, I threw in the white flag and asked for a box to go.

"Thank you for dragging me out my dorm tonight. This was really great. I had a good time."

Yes, I had to admit, I really did have a good time. I didn't feel any animosity towards Edward tonight and I had to admit, a small part of me knew that was a good thing.

If I could handle him now in small increments, that meant he was actually making some progress with me. I may not be ready to forget the past, but I was somewhat ready to move forward into the future.

**I hope this chapter was worth the wait.**

**I had to throw in the candy crush reference because I am addicted! Lol sorry.**

**So... Bella is on her way to forgiving Edward, hopefully Edward doesn't screw it up and go back to square one... we shall see!**

**PLEASE REVIEW AND IF YOU FEEL EXTRA NICE PLEASE REC CWM.**

**THANK YOU SO MUCH!**


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